And How I See Myself

One word. That’s it. One word to describe me… and why.

If I had to choose one word for myself, I think it would be sentimental.

It’s not about holding onto things for the sake of it. It’s about feeling everything a little longer than most. Like the moments. The people. And the conversations that probably didn’t mean as much to anyone but me. But they’ve stayed with me through good times and bad.

Maybe that’s why I asked the question to a handful of close friends as well. After all, they have stayed with me through those same times as well.

Friends Take

One word.
That’s it. One word to describe me… and why.

The answers came back from fiends who know me in different ways. From different times and versions of who I’ve been and have become. Here are their responses.

Resilient

Dani:

Because even with everything you’ve carried—health, heartbreak, all of it—you didn’t shut down or disappear. You kept feeling, kept writing, kept putting pieces of yourself out there for people to connect to. That’s not just surviving… that’s choosing to keep going with purpose.

Kind, Strong and Big Heart ‘ed’

Lily:

Kind.

Liz:

Kind big heart.

Emee:

Strong -n- Kind.

A Warrior

Vinu:

A true Warrior.

Thoughtful

Jen:

Because you are kind and empathetic.

Tara:

You are always thinking of everyone around you.

Generous

Tammy:

For always seeking to amplify other (mostly women’s) voices.

Forgiving

Loren:

I had to pause. Not because it surprised me. It made me think about how often I let things go. Sometimes, they probably stayed with me longer than I admitted. – Rick

Good-Natured

Nadiia:

A word I’m not sure I always see in myself but maybe that’s how this works. Learning from what others see inside you. – Rick

Unyielding

Agnes:

Because no matter what life has thrown at you – your illness, heartbreak, everything – you never gave up or let it change the person you are. You kept going, and you stayed kind through it all.

Vulnerable

Jan:

Through your honest, raw, deep writing, you open yourself up to emotional harm or attacks…you become vulnerable…to criticism, to hurt, to even more heartache.  But you don’t hold back.  The world is tough.  Vulnerability is not a weakness, but rather proves your emotional literacy, Rick, which is something I admire within you.  Deeply ingrained societal conditioning frequently equates masculinity only with strength, stoicism, and emotional suppression.  Yet through your blog, you are willing to be open, to be vulnerable, to be “real” and “true,” taking risks by revealing your innermost thoughts and feelings.  Rest assured, your needs DO matter.  YOU MATTER.  Your health is precarious right now.  You are deserving of special care, support, and protection — especially during this susceptible time.  My wish for you is that you receive these things through a generous amount of comfort and LOVE from many sources. 

My Thoughts

When I step back and look at it all—the words you chose—resilient, kind, big-heart, strong, a warrior, thoughtful, generous, forgiving, good-natured, unyielding and vulnerable … I see descriptions I probably wouldn’t have said about myself.

Not all at once anyway. Because I’ve always focused more on what I carry than how I carry it. Maybe that’s the difference.

Maybe I’ve been holding onto moments too long… while you’ve been watching how I move through them. And maybe—just maybe—somewhere between all of those words is who I’ve been all along.

And if I’m being honest, there’s one more thing I feel.

Gratitude.

Gratitude for all of you who took the time to answer. And for seeing something in me I’m still learning to see myself.

Thank you❣️

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