Drop The Mic

May 28, 2023

 What a fine day today (Friday 4/7/23) has turned into. That is, post morning shower, after the 5 am alarm went off. Generally, I am an early bird. Just not overly fond of getting up before 7 and being denied a cup of coffee. Today was different on both counts. Neither occurred.

     This is ‘cardioversion day.’ Yippee, I woke grumbling. I was warm, comfortable and extremely tired. But got up. I had to. 

     Arrived at the hospital about a half hour earlier than requested. I thought about her walking the hospital’s corridors to the heart institute. And while filling out registration and emergency contact forms. Then she vanished my mind. My game day form took over. It had to. No preoccupation today. None!

     There were no surprises when the anesthesiologist said they’d be doing a “Transesophageal Echocardiogram (TEE)’ beforehand. (I expected something, what not quite sure. But still something.) This was to check for possible blood clots in the heart. I’d be asleep. No anxieties. If there were clots, they wouldn’t proceed with the cardioversion. 

     Turned out everything was ahead of schedule. My procedure wasn’t slated to begin until 10. I was prepped, being probed and prodded by 9:30 and woke from the procedures by 10:15 – 10:20.

      Only after waking did I find out TEE’s negative outcome and the procedures success. 

      Yes, afterwards, I celebrated with a cup of hospital coffee while waiting discharge. A coffee lover’s wait had ended! And another new leaf on life had been granted.

     As I edit this on Easter Sunday, a mere two days later, I think of her. But I try to think harder about Linda Marie, Linda H, Lourdes, Ralph, Jennifer, Tammy, Shanna and family Nick, Shannon, Lisa and Billy for their support. Thank you all!

     But owe so much more than gratitude and thanks to Diane B, Noi and Tara.

     Diane B, no words can say how grateful I am for your friendship and support. Your continued texts I will always cherish. Never, ever stop. I’m always here for you! Now your co-workers know.

     Noi, you’re beyond special and if I may use your words to me, to you. You’re too sweet and a blessing in my life. You really are. And yes, I saved this! So #WhyNotSmile

     Oh Tara, how can I thank you? You’ve made me laugh, blush, smile and think. And regardless of where you’re at, during your travels, you’ve always found time to check in and see how I am. That’s priceless and so are our promises. #PleaseDontEverBecomeAStranger

     Looking forward, I’m assuming the prostate biopsy will, yet again, be shoved back a few weeks, while blood thinners do their job long enough so I can be taken off them for that test. 

     But medically, it does appear the hardest days are in the past.

     Not sure how hard it’ll be to leave her in the past too. I really care for her. Even if we’re just friends. I told her once; I’d love her more than anyone through thick and thin. If only she’d open up. But I know I’ve got to try. If for nothing else, my continued health. Yet friendships are so rare these days. I just don’t know.

     Does time really heal? Or do we just forget? I don’t want to forget, but I want to heal.

     Truly a successful day? We shall see. But it’s sure good having devoted friends and family. Thank you all for being here!

     #WhyNotSmile