The Queens Gambit
March 29, 2023
- “The Queen’s Gambit is one of the oldest and most reputable openings. Unlike openings, the Queen’s Gambit usually evolves into a strategic game rather than an all-out tactical battle. Despite being around for centuries, this opening is still one of the cornerstones of every elite players’ repertoire. It’s also an excellent choice for beginners and intermediate players.” – www.chess.com
A game is fun. Exciting. Challenging. And generally, requires a sole winner.
From early on in life, I’ve played games. Won some. Lost some.
No this isn’t about chess. It’s more than that. It’s more than a game. Although, some may disagree.
It’s about friendships. Losing them and what you have inside your ‘soul’ to try and gain them back. That requires two winners. So far there’s just one.
Recently I lost a marvelous friendship over words. Are you aware ‘words can hurt?’ I was. But I wasn’t thinking. Rather I ‘over thought’ and believed in the worse.
I was wrong. I thought, there was more. I should’ve stayed silent. I was already happy. I shouldn’t have tried reading between the lines. Mostly, I shouldn’t have said the things I did. But I can’t say, I shouldn’t have had those feelings. Feelings are one’s own. Sometimes to be shared, but this clearly wasn’t the time.
They were my ‘Gambit’ as I wanted my ‘Queen’.
One of the pros of ‘The Queens Gambit’ continues www.chess.com, is ‘It puts immediate pressure on’.
The pressure was unwarranted, as you’ll clearly see. My words. Relentless over thinking. An untimely misunderstanding at Valentine’s Day over what? A lack of my own self-gratification. Always thinking the worse. Not remembering she wasn’t mine. She was her own person, with her own soul. I was wrong. My words crushed us both.
You helped me grow. You watch over me now as I type, from the picture you sent. You know the one. The very same shown here. It’s still my favorite, because it came from you.
I think of my little ‘Charlie Brown Christmas Tree’ that very same year. You unknowingly shared your Holiday Cheer. It grew and thrived, as our friendship did, into last year’s beautiful tree that shined.
Through your photos, I saw your journeys to fun places. How happy you looked.
Boston and Fenway Park had always been a bucket list stop for me. But for some reason I never dared alone. Inspired by you, I packed and went. Never saying thank you for bravery you sent, unbeknownst once again.
The ‘phone call’ I hold dearest. Hearing a friendly voice gave me cheer. With that one kind gesture you showed me someone cared. It was the only call I received the entire stay. It truly made my day.
One of the cons, continued www.chess.com, is that one “may have to spend time getting the pawn back”.
Yet it’s not a pawn I’m after. Nor is it ‘The Queen’ I once sought.
It’s the friendship that we once shared so dear.
You can love and not be lovers. Be happy and not have happiness. Being a friend is friendship. Can we remember that’s priceless and try again?
Casey,
From my ‘soul’ to yours, I’m sorry.
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Love You Anyways, The Queen’s Gambit, Skywalker, Star Wars, May The Force Be With You, You’re Worth A Lot To Me
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