An Overthinker’s Thoughts
August 7, 2023
I stole the quote below because it because it hit home for me in more ways than one. Yet, stolen maybe a bit harsh, as actually it was ‘liked’ by someone I ‘follow’ on Instagram and popped up my feed. But in full transparency, I had seen it prior in someone else’s story feed. So, to angela (@authenticangela) • Instagram I give you credit as I did snap it from yours, once I decided to use it. And to the other, I see you, thank you too.
What makes this quote interesting to me is the wording and timing. One could surmise, and rightly so, its reference is pointing to the ‘final’ five months of the year. However, I can also read it as the ‘last,’ as in past, five months thus pushing its inception to February of this year.
I know, I know that’s pushing boundaries but makes perfectly clear sense if you think about it as the ‘overthinker’ I am, along with millions of others on the planet. Go ahead then and sing your song at us. Better yet, I’ll post it too.
I contend Carly Simon‘s an overthinker as well. Hell, she did have the foresight to write ‘You’re So Vain’ back in 1971. I’ll declare it as an early manifestation of GAD or ‘Generalized Anxiety Disorder,’ brought to the limelight by her. And so, you know, it’s not catchy like covid is, that had everyone hiding indoors and making new friends online rather than hanging out with the old ones.
For me it all started in February. However, I was so preoccupied, I hadn’t seen the signs of my medical conditions cropping up. Hadn’t focused, hadn’t been thinking about, let alone overthinking about them until it was too late. My overthinking had taken a nap on me, while other emotions took over control.
Back to the quote. If the latter is correct, then history could be altered. Think about it. Cher didn’t have a clue to this when she had Diane Warren write ‘If I could turn back time,’ as she never went back.
But should I choose to go back in time to this past February and change history? My overthinking self is saying no. Why? Because whether or not I did, I’d still eventually be subjected to the agony of other events that occurred. Like the defibrillator change out. Maybe the cardiac ablations wouldn’t have occurred because of the other stressors involved and same holds true with the cardioversion. But I’m not willing to take that risk. That pain is in the past. Let it alone, my mind’s telling me. It’s something I’d rather not relive anytime soon.
But then again, this little tidbit I found on Madi ARTeaga (@sunsetfreeway) makes perfect sense.
It’s true ‘Nothing changes if nothing changes’ but rather than look back, how about we make the change and hold hope for a better future? Always remembering the once sad and painful events can be turned in to even better and brighter ones…
…while never taking away anyone’s HOPE.
Yes, I like this scenario even better and I HOPE you do too.
UPDATE: May ’24
Sometimes what doesn’t make sense, makes sense. Think about that this Mental Health Awareness Month and let you mind as ease. And if you believe in trying to ‘turn back time’, remember when trying “If I could turn back time, be sure as to not be so vain.”
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